Their heads were squeezed through the door

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Their heads were squeezed through the door

Post  Admin on Sun Dec 26, 2010 12:52 am

Their heads were squeezed through the door

1. Noon to save money, while waiting in line for a beauty behind ask me: "saving money is?" "Boon!" "I just want to take money, anyway you to deposit, be inferior to give me the money, zha both need not waiting in line." Let me think reason, hence give her the money.


2. Afternoon on the bus, took metro card crash and cast into the slot.


3. One day cell-phone has gone rummaged through bags and house each corners, not if really. Hence glumly out land, from pocket sat a cellular phone, giving everyone the cluster message: my cell phone is lost


4. Neighbor forgot his keys, from our balcony doubled in the past, find the key in the room, after turn back, again open his door. The more media &business summit is, I from beginning to end in the balcony, not sense has swift deficiencies. Alas, our head must be the same squeezed through the door.


5. Remember the first time when to girls vindicate too nervous, thus "uh, that, XX, let me be your girlfriend?"


Unit 6. A few days ago, a small younger colleagues to eat a bottle of great Sprite, poured a circle, his turn when the bottle was empty. So the colleague sway Sprite bottle to the attendant say: "this have?" Waiter fart dian fart to run to come over and took the bottle thoughtfully checked, a face cordially say: "have no."


7. And the company two warm-hearted female colleague (plump type) have a meal together, they prepared for my introduction object.


I want to say: you this two matchmaker true enthusiasm


Result an openings: you two fat shiva...


8. Several elder brother playing warcraft. Instructors rounds, great anger, a grabbed the mouse, the desktop warcraft shortcuts dragged into recycle bin, empty, yue: allows you to play!


9. Today old daddy to call my mom's cell phone, when mom in busy, I'll pick up.


I: hello,


Dad: well, your father?


I: ah?


Dad: your daddy stem?


I: er... Call?


Dad: oh, you let him play return my call.


10. Once you play mahjong down, it points candle continue to play, then someone too hot, yell "feed ~ put on the fan" everybody busy advised "no no, candles will be blowing out.


11. Eyeing mittens, the boss to 35 block, I said 30 piece, I'll have it, the boss does not comply to 35, told a few back-and-forth be not willing to concede, I think to calculate, gave zhang 50 pieces, he very hemp of 35 looking for me...


12. A topic request to keep the following four words with clausal structure connections:


1, zhang haidi sister paralyzed,


2, zhang haidi sister tenaciously learning;


3, zhang haidi sister learned than foreign language;


4, zhang haidi sister learned acupuncture.


The correct answer would be: "zhang haidi sister although paralysis, but stubbornly study, not only learned than foreign language, but also learned acupuncture.


The results have a child write: though zhang haidi sister tenaciously learned acupuncture and conflicting language, but she is still paralyzed.


Found another more fierce children wrote: zhang haidi sister to learn not only language, also learned acupuncture, she was so stubbornly learning, and finally paralyzed!


13. Noon cook, my mother gave me a pot of carrot: "go and change of diced carrots cut into!"


14. I surnamed zhu, management unit room. Once someone call my mobile phone: "chicken section chief, you in pig room?" That guy was crazy scold a meal


15. Some leadership led all drink, raised his glass loudly way: "let us together!"


All (...)


16. Remember once went to buy a kind of call Elizabeth fruit, I open my mouth will say: boss, Shakespeare how many money? The boss spot stay


Rice shop 17.


A: boss, come to 22 onion don't rice vermicelli.


Boss (...)


A (part seek seat part turn head to add) : don't put Onions ah!


Boss (tearful) : are you exactly want to eat rice vermicelli or eat Onions?


18. Once went to the market to buy vegetables, preparing dinner, a Korean friends bought lettuce, to the two pieces of four, he put them on all the change has given the hawker, still lack a dime to vendor, so he said --


"My hair, gives you, are so no hair."


Hawker was dumbfounded along while, answer --


"You of hair I don't."


19. Once in the dining hall and chat while we eat, suddenly found themselves put a piece of rice dropped on the outside, inwardly felt wasting food sorry farmer uncle, picked it up and eat. But later found the meal, it seems not my...


20. Jack Bauer in gathering speeches, someone below all ears!


Jack Bauer said: "I hate two people! The first is racial discrimination, 2 it is black, three is the number of character!"


Below people immediately giant sweat...


21. Yesterday after swimming, direct trunk open, keys in, and then close trunk...


22. The good friend's house, to chat, her dad come back, open mouth and then call "aunt", embarrassment, her mother again appear, mouth also called "uncle"... And then unlimited doubts his intelligence


23. Time to buy hot-and-dry noodles, front of a pair of lovers are buying, the boss asks if they want don't put parsley, male and female say don't say how don't.


I beside think "parsley, why male to female parsley, don't parsley..."


Think positive trance? The boss asked me, what to eat? I don't hestitate of loudly answer: "parsley!!!"


24. High school school up very early in the morning, breakfast are old mama done.i I put my bag with eat in school, it is commonly steamed bread dumplings, Sunday made no lessons old mama, I also don't know that rice porridge smoke jin, carries the porridge and then throw bag...


25. One day, said to buy duck were many, then, the old girl recite them say: "come to work day ah, that buy duck increase of impending, saw the window before each roast duck in line."


26. Call financial find a call ZhouChunMei out.


I picked up the phone a concussion: I am ZhouChunMei... | | | = = _


ZhouChunMei: are you ZhouChunMei, that who I am...


27. Once have breakfast at school, front a classmate card, machines have no reaction, brush again or not, very depressed, said the machine is broken, I said let me try, brush card, the loom also really didn't respond! He then changed a, is still the same, very angry! Accept CARDS to just want to put in his hand bag, found the bank is, I laugh wildly! He pointed at my smile worse, originally I take id card!


28. At university, one year begins in the railway station, the dormitory number 5's lovely call the dormitory to see if anyone in, call the dormitory old four answered the telephone.


"Hi, old four ah, I number 5's lovely, dormitory someone?"


Old four nap in a dazely: "ah, number 5's lovely ah, you the dozen is wrong, it is next to the school into dry ()


"Oh, sorry, wrong number"


After a meeting, number 5's lovely to see the number of mobile phone dial think yes, again dozen come back


"Your ya of old four right, teasing me? And dormitory someone didn't"


"No"


"Oh, that I lived friend's house tonight"


"Ok, see you tomorrow"


29. Morning left a plastic bag inside, right hand is full of snacks, morning is a plastic bag garbage bins "bang" open it threw a bag. Then jehoash carrying another ShiRan to company, noon hungry eat snacks when open cupboard discovered the inside is a bag of trash.


30. Take the subway into sluice gate, mobile phone in crazy brush, still and back till I say how to brush don't come out? Machine is broken... Sweat...


31. 20 years ago an old mama yangyang voluminous riding a bicycle twenty-eight inch phoenix would-be send me one more sister in kindergarten, to kindergarten she's extremely cheesy made recruit mantis after legs, feeling a bit pendulum what. She also doesn't mind the wheeled car went and walked a few steps behind someone is Shouting didn't "comrade, the comrades..." An old mama to twist a look, an one more drops little sister keep sitting aghast Niao horizontal fell on the ground, thus after more than 20 years, the an drops sister anyway refused to sit the an old mama drops of bicycle, this hate also hate twenty years...


32. Like all the clacking of melon seed eat. Ghost that god guess, all clacking, plate seeds YiGuNao pour into the trash can benevolence, look at another dish GuaZiKe stunned.


33 standby, to monitor mouse, result still hang standby, overdo along while, found himself sway are mobile phones...


34 cycle to buy things, to the store car didn't lock into the shops. After shopping, put out, ride bicycle locks to go...


35. Childhood like bite pen head and days biting felt something was wrong, special salty, then found suck a mouth ink


36) how times pare entire apple, long batch did not break, very satisfied, conveniently throws the apple into the trash, take the skin will to pick-mouth delivery!


37 scrambled egg with tomato. While holding the boiled eggs in the bowl a long time not edge ke rotten, also say to the wife eggs is broken.


38. The last cold injections, nurse let trousers results almost take off throughout ~


39. The company has times make dizzy, want to go to the toilet, unconsciously go to pure water machine, looking at the front half barrels of water, unexpectedly also have no reaction come over, "this" the sound the crotch zipper open... Suddenly mianmianzhong fiercely reaction come over, "this" the sound and the zipper up, nothing happened go back to your seat. Ok next to no one. Think later, estimate NaZhenZi is too busy working...


40. The picnic touch iv of the YanDian last a, directly in the big fire zippo throw cigarette case put back bag, still barbecue, after a pile of fry out spark spoil 2 people clothes also destroyed 2 bowls of dumpling


41. Take phone when lighters cigar, to take the phone when the TV remote meal press.


42. The dishes when the phone rang. Finish connect telephone directly put telephone put food basin inside. Results and dish go to pot. And then watched pot mobile stare blankly a half-day just hurried out. Well then fry is WoSun.. If mapo beancurd... Finished the...


43. University of time and roommate home together, after taking the door, change clothes together and suddenly see a jack Bauer, she went up pia, then took the jack Bauer's bodies to frighten me. I'm afraid of bugs, a nervous open the door and ran out, she is very excited to continue chasing me... All to the elevator, to "awake" come over, found I only wear the underwear, she... Wore only small pants pants... Fortunately, nobody in the corridor.


44. Once go before lunch toilet, a brain washing hands suddenly saw a mirror short-circuit, very skilled mugs toothbrush, the grandma washing a crowded toothbrush, hum a tune brush a tooth out, still side strange how today's toothpaste didn't taste quite right.


45. The first day, someone to call the manager (female), pass the phone to manager conveniently say, mom someone looking for you, answering the phone.


46. Once the computer lessons, I side give boyfriend send messages, side very brave loudly to the teacher shouted: "husband! My computer is not even on!" NaoRangRang classroom instantly quiet. 5 seconds after all the joke. The teacher is in her 50s small old man.


47. Sister has a mobile phone and a small quick, one day changed a new cell phone card, a colleague has asked her newly bought's number, she said forgot, with the change of mobile phone dial his card. PHS. Dial-up when continue and colleagues chat, PHS rang later, she picked it up and ask: "hello?... hello?... you speak ah, don't talk I hang!"


The presence of colleagues all petrochemical.


After she pressed the hang up, then say: "the mental illness, dozen come over and don't talk".


48. 1 students to zhongguancun turn leisurely, a hawker overforwardly past ask, "to drive not? Cheap" students take come over to look, said: "how hard?"


49. Remember or fifth-grade, the master asked a group of the first student: What is your nationality, Classmate say: Yi "and then asked the second classmate:" you? "Answer:" two families"


50. Customers a: boss, ice soya-bean milk is hot! ...


51. A friend to stroll home appliance, see the ground put a household body scale, the friend fat body, see the scales like to try. Then immediately stepped up, "gaaahh snap" 1, proved, that is a induction cooker.


52. First using IC card, get on the car after I take the initiative to light up card, driver will go up to the seat. Don't want to, the driver say: "read the card", I then on IC card, read: "hefei IC card ~ ~," the driver said: "to the other side, I read" then walk to a driver refers to the place and tried to read aloud a way: "hefei IC CARDS..."


53. Dormitory old four the bed sought along while slippers, no, ask everyone: why my slippers where go to?


54. In the canteen queue, heard flank a boy say: "teacher, come to bowl 'bullet cauliflower' soup!" (laver egg drop soup) haha, laugh too I spray soup.

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